22 August 2011

The State Fair

A couple weeks ago I had a very fun day at the State Fair with these two.

They are of two of my favorites in the whole wide world, in case you didn't know.

Where is Sweet N, you wonder? Sweet N, whose other name is Firecracker, was wisely left with her lovely Grandma, who understands that although FireWORKS are common at the fair... fireCRACKERS in the form of little toddling girls are fairly difficult to reign in or to strap into a stroller for a whole day of walking in a crowded place.

You know what I mean?

Uh huh. I thought so.

We'll take her another time. Promise.

This one, however, loves the stroller. He also loves his sweatshirt and always wants it on with the hood up. Even though it was, like, 85 degrees.

I can't explain it.

But he was adamant about it most of the day.

Upon arrival, we mapped out our plan. We had lots we wanted to see and had all day to do it.

Let's begin (in no particular order.)

1. Lumberjack show.

Hi. Does this fellow bring back any memories fellow Ohioans? Cause when I walked past him I was 10 again, wearing Keds and begging my parents for cotton candy. I was also sunburnt, had on stonewashed cutoffs and a neon shirt with pony beads at the bottom of it.

Oh wait, that's what the girl walking past me was wearing.

Funny how fashion make the full circle. If only I'd kept that shirt...

Anyway, gotta love Smokey Bear and the willing kid who sits hidden in Smokey's tree trunk and talks to the kids through a speaker system thoroughly confusing them and freaking them out day after day.

Yeah. It took me back.

But our destination wasn't Smokey Bear. Smokey Bear was a means to an end which is another Ohio State Fair (ANY State Fair?!) classic and must-see...

The Lumberjack Show! Sawing contests and

log rolling. Fun!

And loud. At least my (hood wearing) boy thought so. But then again he covers his ears at the sound of a bubble blowing machine, so you never can trust his decibel judgement.


2. Rides!

H hasn't riden rides much in his life and he has a bit of fear and trepidation, so I was often his chaperone. Which was okay with me. Now if he had wanted to go on the Scrambler, then I think I would have had to put my foot down. My stomach just can't handle what it used to. I blame it on the frequency with which I tossed my cookies during my pregnancies... but who knows really?

The Merry Go Round I can do! We had a ball. My boy was giggling most of the time. It's the simple things, huh?

And then there was this, the Giant (Super?) Slide. Uh, it's pretty big! On the way down I did not hear sounds of glee from him. I heard some of that fear I mentioned before.

See? Poor little dude.

But by the time we reached the very end he was grinning.

Kids are funny that way.

Gotta love 'em.


3. Let's take a walk down this road, k?


The good and the gross, coming your way friends.

Um, really? No thanks.

Apparently that appeals to some people.

Pig wings? Also not my thing. Not to mention how confusing that must be to the kids...

What about? Muddy Pigs = Chocolate Covered Bacon.


Excuse my language.

Now deep fried S'mores I could do.

But deep fried BUTTER? Could someone enlighten me?

Cause I just don't get it.

Not at all.

Now this, I get.


I stepped up to order.

And honest to goodness I tried to order less than five.

But five was the minimum order.

For realz.

What? You don't believe me?

Would I lie to you?

I wouldn't.

She seriously wouldn't let me orderless than five deep fried buckeyes.

Oh darn.

There she is throwing them in the vat of oil. Nice.

I could have topped them myself and totally would have, except that I knew that if I wanted these toppings on my deep fried buckeyes that I may as well dribble chocolate sauce all over my boy's shirt and sprinkle powdered sugar on his head while I was at it.

And I'm just not that great with a stain stick, so I passed.

I know. Shock of the century. My mother-in-law doesn't believe me right now that I passed on the chocolate syrup. But it's true!

By the way, do you outta towners even know what a buckeye is?!

Cause if you don't, you're TOTALLY missing out.

So google it and go make yourself some.

You'll never regret it.

But don't come to me when your pants don't fit anymore.

It's not my fault.

Yum. (This is a severe understatement, but it's getting late and my clever adjective usage is waning by the moment, as if it was ever good in the first place.)

Wait! Before I leave the subject of deep fried foods, here's one more for ya.

Interesting. Maybe next year.


4. Pigs sculpted out of chocolate.

Um, waste of chocolate?

Sorry dude, I appreciate the gift you have for molding chocolate. But wouldn't paper mache have served the same purpose and you could handed out a free chocolate bar to each passer-by? Cause now who is gonna wanna eat that chocolate after it's been sitting in that hay (straw?!) for a week?


Well, I guess I probably still would eat it.

Is that weird?

I'm not afraid of your everyday average germs and I really love chocolate, what can I say?


5. Decorated toilets?

Somethin' for everyone, I guess.

No further comment.


6. Cake contest

What?! I can't eat those either?!



8. Cooking show. Healthy gourmet! Yippee!

Do you know the best way to enjoy a good healthy cooking show?

While eating a funnel cake. That's how. But I assure you, it's a healthy funnel cake. It's made with whole wheat flour, natural honey sugar particles and fried in wholesome organic hand-picked almond/soy oil that was not tested on animals.

Can you see me giving you a very eager and exaggeratingly convincing nod?

Uh huh.

And that about wraps it up folks.

Nitey Nite.

p.s. Would anyone like to sponsor me for a Weight Watchers membership? This request is entirely unrelated to this post, promise.


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