19 December 2012

Never Say Never

I kinda think that foreign women who stay in this country to give birth are crazy. I always have.

Well, guess who is joining their club.

I never ever ever ever EVER thought I’d deliver a child in this country. I’m adventurous, but not in that area, thankyouverymuch. But you may already know by now that circumstances are such that this is the decision we have come to for this next addition to our family.

I plan to give birth in Africa. In my very own city.

I can hardly believe it myself.

When it came down to it, there were lots of reasons to stay and only one reason to go. And that one reason to go in the end, isn’t valid anyway.

Reasons to stay:

1. To leave would mean 2-3 months of living temporarily somewhere. We’d have to travel 4 weeks before the due date (airline guidelines). Then after the birth we’d have to wait for an American passport and a visa for our wee one to return to this country with us. This takes time.

2. While living temporarily we would have no school for the children and no routine and possibly little support (depending upon where we chose to go). But Mike would still have lots of work to do (his work follows him wherever we go). This is a recipe for disaster. Believe me. I know.

3. If we leave for three months in winter and spring, then we’d be back in time to spend  summer back in this African country. No thank you. I don’t want to do that. Summer here is not my favorite (severe understatment, just trying to not sound too negative) and I’d MUCH rather go to the U.S. in the summer, as is our plan each year.

4. The weather is great in February. Like, doesn’t go much past 90. It feels gloriously chilly to us Sahara Desertites.

5. I can still send my kids to preschool before and after the baby is born even if I’m not working. All I have to do is open up my front door and send them down the stairs. Who gets to do that? It’s amazing and would be so good for them and me to keep this routine as we welcome another baby and adjust to life as a family of five (FIVE?!).

6. I have help. It’s true people. I have lots of help. Namely, a lovely Ethiopian friend who comes to help me with many chores around the house. Now don’t judge… this is how things are done here. First of all, it’s a super dirty country I live in. And help is super affordable (read: CHEAP), she is so blessed to have the work, and frankly… I could NOT do what I do without someone like her helping me in my home. So what I’m saying is if we traveled somewhere else I wouldn’t have someone else to do many of my house chores and how nice is it to have that kind of help postpartum?! It’s dreamy. I live a charmed life, I know. (In that one way, at least, ha!)

7. I’ve had two normal and uncomplicated deliveries in the past, so there is no reason to think there should be a problem this time.

Reasons to go:

1. If there is a complication with the pregnancy, delivery or recovery… medical care is not great.

That’s it. That’s the one reason there is to go. Fear.

And when you see it like that: FEAR… it makes it hard to let that be the factor driving the decision, huh?

Isaiah 41:10
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Deuteronomy 31:6
Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.

Psalm 27:1
The LORD is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The LORD is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid?

Hebrews 13:5-6
For He Himself has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you." So we may boldly say: "The LORD is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?"

Who is in control no matter where in the world this baby comes out? God is in control. And He is good. And He is worthy of my trust. Bad things can happen no matter where a woman pushes a human being out of her body. But as a follower of Jesus, I cannot allow myself to be driven by fear. That would be sin and I try not to sin, right?


Sure, I still have moments of worry… I am human. A female human, in fact, with lots of hormones running through my Mama’s system who loves this baby already.

But I choose to put my trust in Him. Halleluiah!

So here we stay. Here we pray. Here I will labor. Here I will labor with no epidural, oh my!! Here I will deliver. Here I will welcome my sweet baby into my arms and into my life.

Never say never.


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